Geffenite

I can’t believe I’m almost done with my second block of med school! This block has been uber fun….cardiovascular, renal, respiratory medicine. Now I know about 200 more ways that a person can die than I did before I started school. Yippeee!!!! And I can also use big words like “hypertrophic obstructive cardiomyopathy,”  and actually know what it means. So cool.

Going back to school (and med school at that) after a 2 year respite was really difficult at first. I can’t tell you how many “could I BE any more stupid?? How the HECK did I get into this school???” moments. Because school can be so rigorous, I sometimes forget how fortunate I am to be here. All my 23 years of dreaming to become a doctor, and here I am! Man, God has brought me so far. It’s such a privilege to be doing something I love and am so passionate about. I can already tell that I’m going to be one of those people who say wake up every morning and say “I can’t wait to go to work!”

2 more weeks of school, then exams, then a 2 week break!! I literally beam from excitement just thinking about winter break. Stephen and I have many things planned, and it’s hard for me to focus on school because I keep thinking about how fun break will be.

This post had no point, but I just wanted to take a break from writing my learning issue on congestive heart failure. Back to studying diseased lungs and dilated hearts…

Ang

PS….If you are pregnant/plan to be pregnant, don’t take any non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (aka, NSAIDs, aka aspirin-like drugs). Tylenol, aspirin, advil, ibuprofen….no no no!! Even a small dose of NSAIDs can cause a premature closing of the ductus arteriosus in the fetus, which is bad for the baby’s lungs & heart.

Praying my IOU’S

I have to admit, I don’t finish books that often. I start a lot of them, but don’t finish many. And although I am easily moved and convicted by the things I read, rarely do I practice them…or even remember them to be quite honest.

But there is something I read in one of Piper’s books called “When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy” that I’ve actually found extremely  helpful and something I practice on a normal basis. (On a side note, we read this book in CFG our sophomore or junior year in college….shoutout to Annie! )

This morning, I was reminded of it once again as I found myself not desiring God. I was about to dive into my studies as I normally do using the “I’m too busy because of med school” excuse, rather than spend a few quiet moments with Him in the word and prayer. But gladly the Spirit won. So, I wanted to share it with you all. May it help and bless you as it has for me.

Before having a devotional, this is what I pray…

I – Incline my heart.

“The first thing my soul needs is an inclination toward God and His Word. I must want to know God and read His word and draw near to him…Very simply, we ask God to take our hearts, which are more inclined to breakfast and the newspaper, and change that inclination.We are asking God to create desires that are not there.”

Incline my heart to your testimonies, and  not to selfish gain! -Psalm 119:18

O- Open the eyes of my heart.

“I need to have the eyes of my heart opened so that when my inclination leads me to the Word, I see what is really there, and not just my own ideas.”

Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of your law.  -Psalm 119:18
Open the eyes of my heart, O Lord, to see what it says about you as wonderful.

U- Unite my heart.

“My heart is badly fragmented. Parts of it are inclined, and part of it are not…What I long for is a united heart where all the parts say a joyful YES! to what God reveals in His word.

Unite my heart to fear your name. -Psalm 86:11
His delight shall be in the fear of the LORD. -Isaiah 11:3

S- Satisfy me.

“What I really want from all this engagement with the Word of God and the work of his Spirit in answer to my prayer is for my heart to be satisfied with God and not with the world.”

Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days. -Psalm 90:14

To all the people out there who are struggling to find joy in the Lord, or not finding joy in life period….let’s take a moment to go back to the source of joy. Let’s pray our IOU’S, and wait in expectation as God opens the flood gates of joy from His Word and Spirit into our lives!

Material taken from: Piper, John. When I Don’t Desire God, pg 151-152.

While You Can

Michael Jackson passed away a week ago.

There’s something valuable I have learned from his death that I hope to remember till my dying breath here on earth.

We must be good to others while they’re alive.

Here’s what I mean. Even 2 years ago, Michael Jackson was far from being recognized by the media as the “King of Pop.” As far as Late Night Shows, radio shows, media, and movies were concerned, he was “Wacko Jacko”, a freak with a fake nose, and questionable pedophile who had a theme park at his home to lure children. Michael Jackson was the butt of all jokes. Was he white? Black? Nobody knows. Coming to court in Pajamas? Captain Crunch? There was a report that his nose actually fell off during a concert! Michael Jackson wasn’t the icon of a generation. He was a laughingstock.

But here’s where it got strange. He died. Suddenly, the media does a complete 180. Everyone wants to remember the good he did. Kobe suddenly confesses his admiration of Jackson’s work ethnic, Magic Johnson had KFC with MJ, people’s relationships with him were “different.” Did you know that he holds the Guiness World Record for most given to charities? Every radio station seems to want to honor him and the greatness “he was, is, and always will be in all of our hearts for his influential music that touched all of our lives.”

All of this made me so sad. Why didn’t they tell him all this when he was alive? Where was all this when he was still here? How horrible are humans with timing? We bash this guy when he’s alive, praise him like he cured cancer when he’s gone. This isn’t honoring MJ! This is a travesty! Only if MJ was alive to hear all the things being said about him: the memorable anecdotes, the touching goodbyes, the appreciation of his gift from true fans.

But when he was alive, all he heard was what a freak he was. This is disturbingly saddening.

Let’s be good to others while they’re still alive.

Even if your dad makes you angry.
Even if your mom annoys you with that stupid question.
Even if your siblings bother you.
Even if your friend wrongs you.
Even if your lover stresses you out.
Even if your enemy hates you.

Be good to them while they’re here.

Tell them the things that are real in your heart when they’re alive.
Cause if you don’t, you’ll be saying it in front of a room full of people who are wishing they expressed their appreciation when they had their chance.

Be good to people while they’re alive.

-Steve

What a day!

In the news today…

- Farah Fawcett loses her battle with cancer.

- Shaq to the Cavs, official.

- Vince Carter to the Magic.

- Michael Jackson, the king of pop, dies at the age of 50.

Wow, I really feel sad.

All this while walking around with Christina for hours, going from store to store, shopping for wedding stuff.

What a day!

365. Disneyland. Champs.

Hello! Steve & I celebrated our 1 year anniversary yesterday at Disneyland. Of course I forgot to bring my camera. *tears* So this is the only record we have of our fun-filled day.

Awww, I don’t want to embarass him. But I totally owned him at this…again. Keke.

We spent the first hour or so at California Adventureland, which was pretty much a giant carnival. I gotta admit though, the Tower of Terror made me scream like a little girl.

I think my favorite activity of the day was canoeing at the lake in Frontierland. NOT!! It was the most miserable 15 minutes of my day. My arm hurt so bad and our leader person kept yelling at us.

They started new fireworks for the summer, and they were absolutely stunning. I still like the winter one better, but this one was so cool because they had real-life Tinkerbell and Dumbo floating across the sky. So breathtaking!

I love everything about Disneyland! Except for the inhumane # of people packed in (which makes me claustrophobic). And the screaming children. And people with bad BO. And the ridiculously expensive food which makes me want to sneak in kim bap and juice boxes. But still…I don’t think I’ll ever get sick of this place. So magical. I mean….lakercal!

GO LAKERS!!!!!!!! Ladies and gentlemen, your 2009 NBA Finals CHAMPIONS. *sigh* WHAT A SEASON. What a season indeed! End of a 7-year drought. Redemption for Kobe. An emotional catharsis for a loyal Laker & Kobe fan like myself. Things could not be better in Lakerland. I just hope I don’t get killed at the parade tomorrow on Figueroa.

-Ang

I miss journaling. Pixar is cool.

Last night I was talking to Stephen and began lamenting the fact that since we started dating, I had forsaken journaling. He replaced my journal as the recipient of my inner musings, recaps of the day, convicting scripture references, prayers, why I love the Lakers/Kobe, etc. etc. This is what prompted me to start this site. I miss being able to look back at tangible expressions of what was going on in my heart during a specific season, and how God moved. So here it is! The debut of our webpage. I’m sure we will have many adventures to share with you all, as we enter life as young newlyweds. We will both be students. We will be poor. But we won’t go hungry. Hoorrray!!

Yesterday Steve & I watched “Up.”  I’m not a huge fan of pixar (although Wall-E won me over…easily my favorite movie of 2008), so it took much persuading, and I reluctantly followed him to the movies. But as soon as the movie started, I was sold. The story captivated me as I transported into another world and experienced the thrill of adventure. I felt my heart welling up at every corner. I laughed. I cried. No, I really did cry…about 6 different times in the movie to be exact. Which is funny because I think the last movie I cried in was Armageddon (when Bruce Willis says bye to Liv Tyler before he sacrifices himself to blow up the asteroid). When the movie was over, I was so attached to the characters that I didn’t want to leave. It was a beautiful and poignant story, with the kind of message that never gets old to me: Life is an adventure. Let go of the past. Embrace the present. Pixar, you’ve definitely won me over. But can you top this one? This movie now sits on my “favorite all-time movies” list, along with Armageddon (j/k). I want to watch Up again with  my parents. But I’ll bring tissues this time.

Speaking of my family. As our wedding day draws nearer, I find my affections growing exponentially towards my parents. I’ve been observing them closely lately, and noticing the intangible things that make them great parents. Things I never noticed before and took for granted. I’m so grateful that God blessed me to be part of such a loving, stable, nurturing home. That is a gift. My parents are far from perfect, but they are my role models and I hope to take everything I learned from them as I start my own family.

I’m so excited for tonight, I can’t contain it. The past 5 days were excruciating, waiting for this day to come. But it’s finally  here. LET THE NBA FINALS BEGIN!!

-Ang